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{mosimage}Few days back I came across a "finding" by American researchers that disturbed me very much. It had put forward its findings that "People who always say good things about others suffer from low self esteem". What a shit observation! It is absolutely ridiculous and a piece of trash that never deserved such exposure. What they mean to say? This means people who are picky and have no good opinion about others are supposed to have higher self esteem? Else people who always see the good point in others are supposed to be goofy asses? I seriously don't dignify these kind of "findings" but I fear this might spoil the young minds who come across these findings in their formative years.

It had become a routine for American researchers to propose a "findings" and refute the same after few years. The finding must be the other way round. "Those who pick faults from others are supposed to be those suffering from low self esteem and insecurity". The logic is very simple - they either try to hide their inabilities by saying that others are also not perfect, so why should I be picked. It is a sort of defense mechanism. Else those who are unable to look and appreciate the finer points of fellowmates. By keeping criticising others, they tend to keep their self respect low and not letting others to raise above their levels. Only insecure people who has no good opinion about themselves turn nasty and bitch others.

On other hand I believe people who always say nice things about other have a better understanding of life and higher self respect. Only the person who is humble can accept their own shortcomings and can acknowledge the positive attributes of others. It is really a virtue to accept that no human is complete and perfect, so rather than picking on negative points, appreciate the positive points and try to imbibe them. Only when you respect yourself you can respect others. So people who love & respect themselves can be able to respect others and acknowledge other's positive traits, thus saying nice things about them. This goes to say that people who say nice things about other are those who have high self respect. As simple as that.

I believe the article meant to say that people with lesser knowledge tends to say good things about others whom they feel they have good knowledge. It is a general human tendency. Until something remains mysterious, you tend to be in awe with it because you don't know what it is all about. But self esteem and knowledge are two different things. Not necessarily be related to each. There is a thin life of difference between the extremes of self esteem.

Be nice to others is what I had learnt from the experiences of all these years. No human is perfect as well as bad. All their behaviours can be attributed to their upbringing. Everybody's action has a reason / logic behind it and they have their own appreciable points as well as dark secrets including us. Sometimes they might have been trained to react in such a way or they are unaware of other ways of reacting. Sometimes people have their own insecurities due to past experiences, thats how behaving in such a manner. If you couldn't agree with some trait's of fellow being, rather than bitching keep away diplomatically and pick their nice points alone. So if we start looking everybody in a positive light, we can feel the beauty of the world. Atleast this is what my past experience hade taught me.

So don't stop saying nice about others! Above all don't buy the recommendations of these kind of stupid researches.

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About myself
Maheshwaran
Author: MaheshwaranWebsite: https://www.maheshwaran.com
I am a SAP Consultant in my late 30s, residing in the happeing IT City - Bangalore. My interests vary from reading to travelling to handicrafts to photography. My latest interest is on Body building. May be this vivid interest keeps me going in my life without getting bored.